Are You Ready To Rumble?

by Chef Back Burner

I was so excited. Not only is a Season 3 of Top Chef waiting around the corner, we get a Battle of the Seasons, too! Jackpot! And while the lack of Leanne is a little disappointing, I’m ok with the lineup. It felt like a 2 year reunion and seeing Season 1 brought a smile to my face. I have to say though it didn’t feel like a senior and junior class...more like a senior class and a group of freshman. So, in the spirit of this high school analogy I though I would start with some of my favorite “yearbook” quotes from this episode...

“He’s kind of cute?” (said in a sarcastic fashion in reference to Sam)

Ted, fabulous, Ted..we love you and like to think we had something to do with getting you on the show. By the way, so excited about Uncorked.

“I got lot’s of offers...things that are way too big, I think.”

You just keep telling yourself that, Ilan. Not that I doubt you have interesting conversations but come on, you didn’t exactly prove yourself to be easy to work with or completely professional during that last season. And then you sicced your mom on anyone who didn’t like you. If I was a restauranteur, I’m not sure I’d be wanting to partner with you...and your mom. And the hair, man...what are you doing with your head?

”I do”(When asked if he thought Season 1 would win.)

Why doesn’t this comment surprise me at all, Stephen. You are still the same smartass sommelier...snotty and sophisticated. I loved the tie. You got class, pouring out your...butt.

“1 hand, 2 eggs, 10 minutes...shit!”

Yah, Sam, you’re still slick as all that but you also need to get over yourself. We all get that your hot and the angry face keeps your jaw flexed and sexy...but being able to hold down a job is important to most ladies out there.

“What better way to approach a smack down than a Spanish foam.”

Was this really necessary Marcel? I mean really...Live and let live. While I wasn’t sure why everyone hated you during Season 2, I have to say be the bigger man...it’s not that hard when you’re talking about Ilan. With comment’s like this, you’re gonna have Ilan’s mom on your back so fast...

“If the bitch can cook let him cook.”

God, Dave, put it on a t-shirt...maybe you should start your own line of “Clothes You Can Cook In”. I mean add that one with “I’m workin on breathing” and your prior “Bitch, Bitch” and you’ve already got your first line of tee’s. You are still you and it’s nice to see. Maybe not the calmest guy in the bunch but you will always bring something different, with a smirk and a pinch of sarcasm.

“I can’t be goin down against this guy.”

So, Harold, opening a restaurant should add confidence but it seems it added a little weight. I understand that taste testing can go right to your thighs...but put the spoon down. We love you too much to let you do that to yourself.

“To be judged by them...it’s just beezare.”

Elia, were you even present at the challenge? I didn’t see you..maybe it was the white hair...I was waiting for you fly up in the air and make lightening strike the Season 3 cheftestants down.

“I think I’m gonna win.”

Tiff, I saw a new you...I hated you first season, but I think the fact that you learned from your actions and seemed a better person for it. You’re a chill chick and you can come make beef at my house anyday...I won’t eat it but I’ll keep you company while you cook.And finally, I think one of my favorite moments was when Tom looked at the Season 3 contestants sitting at his table and said “This is about the last time you’re going to able to be critical”, in other words “Laugh now, suckers.” I mean, if I wanted to dislike the upcoming contestants, I did the right thing by watching this show. Could they be anymore snotty? But I will leave them alone, because, hey...I get to start ripping into them next week.

The challenges were...eh. I mean cooking with one hand tied behind your back is cute but they were making eggs and there were no funny shots of them trying to crack it? Highly disappointing. And while it was so good to see people in action again, the main challenge was a little “blah” when it came to presentation and editing. It looked a little like a bistro instead of a competitive high class meal. They totally downplayed the fact that Season 1 did a wine pairing with all their courses. I really hope that all this was because this show was an after thought to the planning going into Season 3. However, if this is any statement about what’s we should expect...Stop! I’m not going to put the cart before the horse or to make a food analogy the dessert before the main course.

I am extremely glad that Season One won (ha!). It’s really no surprise though, as our readers pretty clearly predicted. They really do have it all over Season 2. I would believe each to be chef in their own right with a level of maturity that the others just haven’t reached. It’s ok because we all progress in our own ways at our own pace...but Season 2 is about a year or so behind.

So, it was fun...and a good appetizer for next week...I will leave you with my favorite quote of the evening spoken by our beloved Sam, to whom we’ve been pretty loyal...When asked what advice he would give to the next batch of cheftestants, he responded...

“Don’t read blogs because you’ll find out shit about yourself that you didn’t want to know about yourself and that you didn’t even know about yourself.”

Thanks for your support!